boxers

0950

In the big room, on a reading break, Monk takes off his shorts. Gabe grimaces.

~~~

”Great, Monk, you’re just going to walk around in your boxers, what class!”

I’m hot, and it feels so humid. It’s too early and the temperature is too low to put on the air-conditioner. Forgive me for not wanting to suffer!

”I don’t know if I can suffer those chicken legs! What did I do to deserve this?”

Well, now that you make me think of it, you were the one who put me on the path to wearing boxers. That was all you! And since boxers do look so much like regular shorts, it makes it that much easier to use them like shorts, though, to be sure, I wouldn’t go downtown with boxers, though the bus crowd might not think it terribly out of the ordinary.

[Gabe chuckles.]

”I’m so glad you treasure my advice and wisdom! But when I said you should wear boxers, I didn’t mean to treat them as formal wear.”

Well, I’m an improviser, an innovator. I take an idea and get creative with it. To tell you the truth, if I didn’t have such a small package, I’d go naked.

”You’d walk around the house naked with your father there?”

No, but he’s still in bed.

You aren’t going to say anything about my small package?

”No, I thought I’d let that lie there.”

That’s what really ruined it for us, right? when I admitted to you that I am not hung like a porn star.

”Ugh, I’m outta here. You are welcome for the boxer shorts.”

I was just joking. A little.

drop tacos from my diet

I think I’m going to have to drop tacos from my diet, or at least go much easier on them, keeping them in only for variety. I cannot remember the last time I really enjoyed my tacos. It feels as though I need the beans to leaven the bitterness of the seasoned meat. I think I’m going to have to favor the burritos.

Gabe says, “Hah, I thought you said I would want to marry you for your tacos.”

No, that was my chili. And I didn’t really think that you would go for marriage, of course, but you probably would have thought that it was worth a roll in the hay. But that was then.

She says, “What, your chili is not as good as it used to be?”

Heh, okay, let’s go with that.

didn’t get more than a decent shower

Post-nap. It looks the skies are clearing up. After all those winds and that fuss in getting the cats back inside yesterday, we didn’t get more than a decent shower out of it, and the ground is still cracking up. Worse yet, we’re heading smack into another hellish dry spell. Definitely another hard summer.

the earmuffs

Pop asks about the earmuffs, and he is very impressed by them.

I said, “They are a lot better than the earplugs you got for us.”

Pop said, “Those are just to get by. This is the real thing.” He definitely likes the idea of using them when mowing the lawn, or perhaps I should say of my using them when I mow the lawn.

I also like to use them when he is eating in the kitchen and watching TV and I need to start preparing my dinner. Those old cowboy shows he watches are as bad as his country-western music. The muffs only muffle speech, but we are talking of a reduction in volume of greater than 50%, and I will gladly take that. The earplugs we were using, I suspect only cut the volume by maybe 5 percent, if we are generous.

If only I could sleep with these earmuffs! The dogs and the traffic, as well as the work trucks in the morning, are pretty bad. It’s not an every night kind of thing, but it is not rare either. On average, maybe it is a once-a-week problem. I have enough built-in sleeping problems with my overactive bladder and a nocturnal father. But I suppose technology can only do so much for this run-down life.

a lot of log-ins to go through

For somebody with no e-life, I sure do have a lot of log-ins to go through. I must eat up a good ten, fifteen minutes just getting settled in.

Gabe says, “Yeah, but that includes going through your e-mail and your friends’ page.”

It’s pretty unusual for me to have e-mail. I only got these two because I happened to drop a couple of comments at a couple of communities. We’re only talking about a few minutes.

This is a big reason why I now often go without the early-morning blogging rounds, to save myself a round of log-ins, and for what is only an abbreviated session anyway, something, nevertheless, which would have been unthinkable back in the day, back when the conversations were real.

In fact, I sometimes hanker for the early Blurty days, before I had any e-friends at all, and when I had no thought for ever needing or wanting a second blog, much less a third or fourth one. I imagine a very simple, unified routine. There would be no concern about how things look to others. Just one blog and a very linear focus.

“Does that mean no more porn blog?”

Oops, I guess I forgot that one. Though, in this special singular blog, maybe that could be like one line of book-blogging.

“NaaAAHH! I don’t think you have thought this through.”

I guess not. But you get the idea of what I am going for.

“I think you’re underestimating the e-life that you have. I understand that it must be very lonely compared to the way it was, but you are getting some needed attention that you really should not want to go without, and which you shouldn’t take for granted.”

You’re probably right. But I can see myself just book-blogging, not even making any personal home notes, and I find that picture deliciously cozy.

“You wouldn’t want to write about the cats?”

Hmm, yeah, I might have to include them.

“And what about any good dreams that you have?”

That’s true. Some dreams really do stir up my soul, and I would want to keep them.

“I think you are really about where you want to be, so long as you have no intention of giving real life and real people a chance. Maybe you should just slow down. You don’t have to make a dozen posts a day. I know you often force posts just because of a personal schedule you want to maintain, but it’s not like you are getting paid by the post or by the hour - or at all! Maybe you should just slow everything down. Take away the stress, and just do it so it feels good to you!”

Now that is something to think about.

a man thing

Funny. When you’re just putting books on your wish list, they always look so good, but when you are ready to lay down a few dollars to buy one, they seem to lose all their charm.

Gabe smirks, “I think that’s a man thing. They are certainly that way about women.”

Do I detect some bitterness? I thought you are the one who usually leaves them wanting more.

“Hah, you can say that again! But when I am with a man, I am with him. My eyes aren’t floating everywhere, dreaming about being with others, flirting with others, and cheating with others - unless I am cheated on first!”

But I suppose love is one of those games where it matters even less if you win or lose, so long as you are playing.

“Monk, dear, anyone can play. Some people just prefer to dream about it. Or watch chikan videos.”